Week 49 - NILMDTS

December 23, 2015  •  Leave a Comment

Sunday morning at 8:20am, I received a call from one of our local hospitals.  They had two cases of infants that had either died, or would pass away soon.  The families wanted the services of a Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep photographer, and wanted remembrance sessions for their children.  This was my first session.  I had not shadowed any of the experienced photographers, and I was so nervous! 

In the first session, the infant was still alive.  I tried to remember everything that we were taught, and the session went smoothly.  The second session was the challenge.  The infant had passed away the night before.  It took everything within me not to burst into tears.   My heart ached for the parents.  Mom wanted images of the baby alone.  I completed the session in about thirty minutes.

On my way out, the nurses told me that another infant had passed away, and asked if I could do the session.   They told me that they would understand if I said "no".  They knew that this was my first time.  I told them that I could handle it, but I started crying.  I told the nurses that I had to leave, and grab something to eat.   However, I would return to do the session.  I was back within 45 minutes, and completed the session.  The parents' tears tore me apart, but I held everything in.  It was in my car that I broke, and cried.  I was in a fog for the rest of the day, and I didn't sleep well that night.  I shared my experience with other NILMDTS photographers, and they provided me with sage advice.

For obvious reasons, I cannot share the images of these precious children.  Even if I could,  I would not.  I am sharing one of the graphics that NILMDTS uses.  These beautiful children have left an imprint on my heart. God bless and keep those families.

 


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